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Introduction from The Extraordinary Workplace
Something was wrong. As a business consultant and speaker throughout the United States and Canada, I had worked closely with leaders and employees in a wide variety of businesses, organizations, and industries, including hospitals, physician practices, CPA firms, law firms, auto dealerships, banks, restaurants, museums, retirement centers, retail stores, non-profit agencies, school districts, insurance agencies, government agencies, construction companies, chambers of commerce, and numerous small businesses. I was very concerned.
These experiences provided a bird’s eye view of the internal workings of so many diverse entities. Although these wide-ranging businesses and organizations had various services and products, they all had one thing in common—an underlying theme that was very disconcerting.
Sadly, I came to realize that most workplaces are filled with misunderstood relationships, emotional turmoil, internal competition, and reactionary dynamics. The complexity of most organizations is escalating; the water is heating up, so to speak. Now more than ever, people feel uncertainty, trepidation, and deep anxiety about their future.
The present workplace environment is fraught with fears and envy, egos
competing for validation and attention, managers disempowering employees,
co-workers hurting and sabotaging one another, and most insidious
of all, an underlying fear permeating the atmosphere with insecurity and
indecision.
Do you think this is an exaggeration? It is not. The pressure resulting
from the high demands in an ever-competitive business environment can
be seen in the faces and heard in the words of employees on any given
day in any business. The pain and high levels of stress are reflected in numerous
national and international studies of employee satisfaction, employee
engagement, loyalty, and retention. The work environment has
never been more combative and filled with emotional turbulence. It is almost
amazing that any work is accomplished, considering all the distractions.
I am going to suggest that most business productivity and
achievement is motivated by fear rather than inspiration.
Suspend your judgment and consider the possibilities for new levels
of business success and advancement if we had an environment of compassion,
respect, and freedom. Instead of wasting energy and time with
negative emotions, individuals could contribute from their full potential
with eagerness and enthusiasm.
More than ever before, businesses and organizations need the energy
and synergism that comes from good relationships, teamwork, creativity,
and productivity among leaders and employees. Developing the potential
of everyone, and allowing their full expression and talent in the roles that
they play, is essential for a company’s success. To rise above the clamor
in such a declining market, and to navigate during the lean times, companies
must understand the power of honor, respect, and group engagement.
Enlightened leaders who recognize that they must release the
powerful energy and intelligence of the people in their organizations will
build extraordinary workplaces and achieve high levels of business success.
But in reality, most leaders do not maximize performance, and instead
unwittingly deplete the energy of those they need to drive their financial goals.
Businesses have followed a model of managing, measuring, and distributing
financial capital as a basis for increasing profitability. What this
old model doesn’t recognize are the resources that create capital: people,
relationships, and the innate ingenuity of the employees within the organization,
often the frontline workers. This potential is being suppressed
in businesses everywhere.
Measurements and metrics that don’t address the underlying issue of
managing people and relationships will produce limited results. They
could be likened to a football game in which demands are made to increase
the scores on the scoreboard without consideration of the team
members who must play the game and make the touchdowns. Metrics
are simply the reflection of the activities, services, and relationships of
people, not the other way around.
Top-down directives do not allow for possibilities coming from the
human capital, which could, in fact, increase market success, create new
business opportunities, and ultimately drive profitability. The old model
is obsolete and new steps are necessary to stop the tidal wave of events
threatening businesses all across the country. Blind faith in dogmatic,
rigid systems has led to enterprises that are imploding. Downsizing is increasing
and unemployment is rising, with predictions of more layoffs.
Enlightened leaders recognize the value of human capital and the importance
of relationships within the company and with customers. Creating
an environment of trust that capitalizes on all people in the
organization will produce a competitive advantage. The business will also
be a happier place to work, a driver for loyalty, retention, and commitment.
The new model will produce cooperation instead of competition
as leaders respect and honor the spirit in those they lead. I am suggesting
that within every human being is an invisible, inner spirit that is connected
to the power that sustains all life, as well as to one another.
Whether we are aware of it or not, this internal spirit resides beneath the
ego roles and is eternal.
While working with many different organizations, I have observed the
results of the old business model. I have seen prejudices, harassment, political
and territorial battles, selfishness, grandiosity, betrayal, and suffering—
all consequences of disempowered human beings trying to elevate
themselves at the expense of others. Gossip by both men and women is
rampant, and power struggles between individuals and groups occur at
all levels—from the CEOs down. Gossip provides temporary relief from
pain by giving a sense of power to those engaged in it and by allowing
them to share their misery. Even as it appears to temporarily relieve some
pain in individuals, gossip does so at the cost of adding more negativity
and uncertainty to the work environment.
Some people are energized by a competitive environment. This, however,
is only temporary because fear and mistrust always accompany
the cutthroat atmosphere. Deception and suspicion are prevalent, and
the ever-present shadow of anxiety lurks in the background. Emotions
are suppressed and people are psychologically and energetically out of balance.
The workplace has become an emotional combat zone where people
suffer from stress and insecurity in the very place they rely on for their
financial security. And so great is the fear of losing job security, many
people cannot readily admit, even to themselves, that the situation is this
traumatic. Finally, leadership rarely recognizes or is willing to acknowledge
these problems, even though they are felt throughout the organization.
So the anxiety resides beneath the surface, because addressing it is
too frightening and filled with unknown consequences for those who
dare.
Why is all this turbulence in the workplace occurring?
It is the result of the ego’s efforts to overcome its own sense of powerlessness
in the face of fear and uncertainty. Large financial business failures,
problems in the national and global economies, and rapid changes
in the local and worldwide business environment have created a new level
of anxiety and apprehension. In addition, the need to learn new technologies,
the “personal hell” created by email, a 24/7 work week powered by
mobile and electronic technology, and a workaholic theme that permeates
businesses today have all added to the sense of exhaustion and helplessness.
People feel they cannot keep up with the demands yet they must
continue to produce and to maintain their jobs. And as the economy
drops and the downsizing increases, numerous employees are working
with the sense of a hatchet hanging over their heads.
People everywhere have a sense of being lost in the storm, and feel insignificant
and vulnerable. The inner sense of authentic power and confidence
required to withstand this pressure is obscured by fear, fatigue,
and the need to cope with the ever-present cutthroat attitude of bosses
and co-workers. Some leave the employment environment in favor of
self-employment or entrepreneurship. Those options require the courage
to take risks, which include the loss of healthcare and other retirement
benefits, and uncertain income. Those are difficult choices when one is
supporting a family. So most employees feel trapped in their workplaces,
where they are disengaged, not working at their full potential, emotionally
suppressed, and secretly looking for a new job.
This harried and impersonal environment has resulted in a variety of
behaviors by people attempting to cope and to reduce fear. These are
methods to disguise and prevent pain. The projection, blame, gossip, back
stabbing, manipulation, and other dysfunctional behaviors are all attempts
by the ego to deny the deep lack of self-worth. These attempts to
bolster the ego are futile strategies to mask insecurity and alleviate anxiety.
Unfortunately, the pressure to perform leads to sacrifice, compromise,
and abandonment of values at all levels within the organization. The corruption
and greed of leaders in many organizations are starting to surface
and be revealed in the news on a daily basis.
The current model is a fractured system of falsities and misalignments.
Elaborate schemes to protect the power and wealth of the dominant few
have made business and government systems very complex, with many
layers of protection. These structures need to be weakened, broken, and
eliminated to allow a new system to take their place—one that honors and
respects the privacy and rights of everyone. The more people who understand
the way out of this massive delusion, the faster we can escape it.
The response from both leaders and employees of various organizations
throughout the country is a resounding “yes,” confirming that the
situation has, indeed, reached critical proportions. The crisis doesn’t exist
in just a few organizations and businesses, but occurs to some degree in
nearly every single business throughout the country. Today, people cry
out for a solution and anxiously pray for some relief from this dilemma.
People are spiritually hungry and emotionally depleted. They do not
know how to escape from the misery experienced in the very place where
they spend three-fourths of their waking hours. It is a double-edged
sword: they feel they depend on the organization to provide their economic
security, and yet staying in the organization causes them enormous
levels of anxiety and apprehension. Many people feel immobilized. Counselors
and physicians are seeing a growing number of desperate and unhealthy
people who suffer from job stress. In addition, because of their
desire to be loved and appreciated, people are slaves to a rigid system of
rivalry and dysfunction.
Rebuilding relationships with trust, honor, and respect is the only way
businesses will survive. I will share a new method for understanding and
breaking through the intense drama. Those engaged in it are unable to
discern the underlying causes of the confusion and resentment. The solution
is simple but very abstruse. Those on the stage are too deeply involved
to see the whole picture. In fact, it is nearly impossible for an
individual to come out of the depths of the drama without a helping hand
to lift, support, and show a way out.
This book will share with you a framework that illuminates and simplifies
the complexity of the web of reacting and counter-reacting egos.
The model will help you discover a way to operate from authentic power
rather than from the fragile power of the ego. It is then a process of practicing
and demonstrating this new way to interact with the people with
whom you work. You must do the suggested steps (not just read the book)
to truly rise out of the dissension and confusion, and thus have the power
to create change for yourself and others. The results will be the proof. The
positive outcome will be recognized and perpetuated. It will cause a
domino effect in the workplace, and it will be self-rewarding to those who
commit to and practice this unique approach.
The good news is the workplace can provide many opportunities for
learning and evolution because life lessons are presented in relationships.
Because of the repeated interactions in the workplace, egos are often
hooked in, resulting in suffering, anger, projection, and self-doubt. Frequent
interaction with the same people results in intensified emotions
and reactions. When you can respond to conflicts with self-reflection,
confrontations and painful experiences will provide portals for personal
evolution and realizations. It is our life purpose to become restored to
our inner greatness, our true selves, and our inherent joy. As they bring
up pain and anxiety within us, relationships can also lead us to discover
the source of the problem, so we can release it and become free.
However, it is not easy to give up the demands of the ego, because we
will do anything to protect its false identity. We find it personally humiliating
to let go of our need to be in control because we fear doing so will
diminish the image we have of ourselves. Our ego is dependent upon the
reactions of others to validate and to reinforce its identity; we do not give
up this emotional turmoil easily, even when it causes immense suffering.
This book is intended to help create a transformation in business leaders
that will then make it safer for employees to also begin the process.
Although anyone can stop playing their automatic part in the scenes
played out by others in the workplace, it is generally more impactful when
the practice is initiated by those in leadership positions, because of their
perceived authority.
Through this model, it will become clear that the only path to genuine
success, inner peace, and ultimate happiness comes from facing and then
challenging the ego. The book is intended to help people step off the stage
of the long-running drama in the workplace and find personal freedom.
GETTING TO THE SOURCE OF THE POWER STRUGGLES
How does this change come about in the tightly woven drama of intertwined
egos? The aim is to shed light on the core causes and fundamental
reasons for power struggles, territorial battles, and lack of camaraderie.
Leaders, business managers, and owners can most easily begin taking
steps to unravel the closely-knit mesh of egos in the workplace. Those
they lead are often too disempowered and wounded to initiate the process.
However, we are all endowed with the same authentic power, in spite
of the temporary roles we play in our workplace. If you can see beyond
the hierarchy, you can be a light for others as you relax and operate from
your inner source rather than from the fear of loss and the need to placate.
You will add a positive stream of energy, helping to uplift those around
you.
This book is not a simple how-to course on the steps to become a good
leader. I have found most courses and books on leadership are instructions
on how to change behavior and how to act like a leader. Any real,
long-lasting change comes from discovering the underlying belief systems
that limit decisions and opportunities. This book teaches you to realize
and release barriers that prevent inner qualities of authentic and enlightened
leadership from emerging.
Most leaders in all sizes of organizations operate from the ego, rather
than from authentic power. The ego blocks true creativity and energy that
could be unleashed in the workplace. Egoic leadership also constrains the
abilities and possibilities of its followers, which impacts the bottom line.
Some symptoms of an ego-driven management style include the following:
- Personal agendas rather than the common good of the
organization are the order of the day.
- Conditioning from past mistakes and disappointments is the
basis for decisions.
- External validation such as money, status, and power are the
motivators.
- Projection and blame, rather than ownership and personal
responsibility, are the norm.
- Fear is the underlying factor for all action.
- Rivalry and internal competition block true teamwork and
alliance.
- Lip service and inauthentic communication are common.
- Rigidity and high control are the underlying structure.
- Disregard of employees’ needs or feelings is normal and
usually rationalized.
- Discrimination (age, race, gender, weight, sexual orientation,
religion, etc.), though denied, is occurring.
Moving away from the ego-driven, top-down management style is critical
for companies to grow, to attract and retain competent employees, to
increase employee engagement, to gain loyalty and respect, and to build
cooperation and contribution.
What does it take for leaders to make this transformation?
A restoration to authenticity requires the courage and willingness of
leaders to look with an unflinching eye at their own inadequacies and
fears. It means looking within and seeing errors, misjudgments, and false
claims of righteousness. Honest and deep reflection will allow strength
of character, integrity, and true leadership to arise.
This book will aid in finding freedom from the ego, the self-created
identity and source of the endless battles in almost every business. Becoming
an enlightened business leader will require disengaging from the
insane drama and creating an environment of harmony, trust, and compassion.
Because of ego-driven management, millions in the workplace feel as
though they are in prison, with little freedom of expression or ability to
perform and contribute at their highest level. Learning to face the ego
and becoming an enlightened leader are meaningful and necessary goals.
Business leaders who begin to personally transform and become restored
to their true selves will free employees to work creatively and productively
within an environment that fosters their true potential.
As leaders give up the need for superiority, employees will lay down
the defenses and complaints of the downtrodden. People will learn to give
up blaming others for their circumstances and take back their own destinies.
As leaders elevate their own understanding, they will be models
for those they lead. Those they guide will find liberation and discover
their own inner authority. People who are free will perform better.
The ability to transcend murky waters and complex interactions can
come about only when one connects with the inner spirit residing in each
of us. Then we acknowledge the same spirit in others. Giving up ego demands,
however, is very difficult and will take commitment and determination.
The ego’s goal is to keep fear below the surface and to convince
you and others it is invincible. Getting someone to give up the demands
of the ego is like taking a favorite toy away from a child who grasps it
tightly. We do not let go of our demanding ego without a fight.
The real conflict becomes ego versus spirit. It is a most formidable battle
because the ego is relentless and shrewd in its desire to remain in
charge. But as you persevere, the grip of the ego will diminish and spiritual
strength will begin to replace the artificial power of the ego.
Like anything new, it will take practice, and you will have some trials
and errors in the workplace. But gradually, the results will become apparent.
People will begin to communicate on a deeply honest and respectful
level when they feel trust and integrity in the environment. Gossip
and sabotage will become a thing of the past as people begin this process
of changing internally and accepting personal responsibility. They will
enjoy coming to work, sharing mutual goals, and feeling the satisfaction
of a job well done.
Businesses will reach new, extraordinary levels of success as the synergy
of teamwork is allowed to emerge in an environment where optimism
and compassion prevail. Employees will start to feel loyalty once
again, and organizations will attract and retain the kind of people they
desire. Cooperation without suspicion will return to the workplace. When
everyone no longer expends energy in battles with one another, new vigor
and vitality will become available for positive production and success.
This positive force of human dynamics has been so restricted in the current
environment.
I invite you to join me in the worthwhile endeavor of rebuilding relationships
in the workplace so businesses can become extraordinary and
people everywhere can have a better quality of life. The workplace is
where millions of people come face to face with the issues within themselves
that need healing. Let us use the opportunity to rediscover who we
are and be restored to our inner, spiritual greatness. Discovering our
strength by recognizing and letting go of fear will lead to genuine happiness
and deep fulfillment. As the workplace atmosphere becomes peaceful,
our families, communities, social structures, governments, and future
generations will be affected. We will begin to experience the joy, tranquility,
and vitality we desire and deserve.
So to be very clear, the goals of this book are two-fold: short term—
heal the pain; long term—heal the soul. As we each do our part to awaken
to our authentic selves, we contribute to the collective consciousness and
we create an extraordinary workplace.
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